When Jack Hegarty was in grade 6, the children at school said gay men were all "poofs and faggots". If you were homosexual, you were guaranteed to get AIDS and die, and those attracted to the same sex were "disgusting".

The homophobic vitriol that circulated in the playground cut deep for a teenager who knew he was gay and wanted to be open with friends at his Traralgon high school.

When he came out, a year later, Jack was bullied and harassed "every minute of every day". The 13-year-old was pushed against lockers, had rocks and food thrown at him, was beaten up in the toilets and barred from the sports changing rooms by other students. Once, his hair was set on fire.

"The first four years at high school were a very lonely, very isolating time," says Mr Hegarty, now 19. "I think homophobia is still extremely common at schools, especially in rural areas . . ."

But now he is whittling away the barriers for young gay and lesbian people in the country. He was recently appointed one of 14 "social pioneers" with the Foundation for Young Australians, which will provide him with mentoring to take his message of acceptance nationwide.

When he suffered ridicule at the hands of his classmates, he used drugs and alcohol to numb his feelings. Eventually, he tired of being picked on, and he and a handful of other gay and lesbian schoolmates began to meet regularly at lunchtimes in an empty classroom.

With the help of local organisation Kilmany Uniting Care, this informal group became the Whatever Youth Diversity Project, a regular gay and lesbian youth support group in Traralgon.

Its members meet fortnightly and go to local events to hand out information. They always run out of brochures and the reception is getting friendlier.

But Mr Hegarty, who is studying youth work at TAFE, says school remains the real battleground.

According to the most recent national survey of young gay people, La Trobe University's Writing Themselves in Again, school is the most dangerous place: about 75 per cent who were abused experienced this at school.

Sue Hackney, co-ordinator of the WayOut Rural Victorian Youth and Sexual Diversity Project, says that while the State Government has developed some excellent sexuality resources, the onus still lies on teachers to use them.

The OUTthere Rural Victorian Youth Council for Sexual Diversity is running two online surveys for young people and schools staff at wayout.org.au